If you are invited to a wedding where the rites and rituals are different from your norms, would you leave?  Well, a minister of the UK Government, Jim Fitzpatrick, did exactly that.  The minister for food and farming and his wife abruptly left a wedding in the East London Mosque in Whitechapel when he was told that it was an orthodox Muslim ceremony where men and women would be segregated.  His excuse for leaving?   He said: “The segregation of men and women didn’t used to be as much of a strong feature. We’ve been attending Muslim weddings together for years but only recently has this strict line been taken. It is an indication of the stricter application of rules that is taking place.” In other words, he was being judgemental: segregation isn’t right and it is especially NOT right in the UK. What he is saying is this practice interferes with social cohesion. It’s wrong!

I find it very hard to understand how an MP is so ignorant of the many practices that go on in this country. It is not just Muslims who might practise segregation at a wedding. Doesn’t he know that orthodox Jewish weddings practise segregation and it is also to be found at Hindu and Sikh weddings, amongst others? He’d better do his homework before he accepts another invite and, frankly, dishonours his hosts. Then, to speak of his anger afterwards seems the height of rudeness. He obviously took offense – but has now given it too.

Personally, I have always taken an invitation to an occassion like this as a great honour and a priviledge. The invitation demonstrates acceptance of me as a person even though I may be ‘different’ and it gives  me a wonderful opportuntity to experience someone else’s culture, traditions and religions. It gives me an opportunity to learn. Jim Fitzpatrick should be tolerant enough to be respectful of others and their practices especially at occasions like these. Why like these? Well, especially for marriages, people often like to celebrate these occasions in a way that has been traditionally handed down – this style of ceremony was the family’s choice and has probaly been in their families for generations..   This was not the occasion to make political statements. May the happy couple be blessed with a happy marriage without the fuss.

However, there are aspects of what Jim Fitzpatrick has said that we all ought to take account of. Evidence exists that shows there is a rapid encroachment of Islamic fundamentalist leaning in specific areas of London, Birmingham and Manchester. The influence of the Islamic Forum of Europe (IFE) is seen as distrubing as it appears to be enforcing its views on the local Muslim population. Muslims in Britain have come from so many different sects and countries that their religious faith and practices are as diverse as those within the Christian religion.  We readily accept that there is a huge difference between a Jehova’s Witness and a Baptist – so to in the Islamic faith. We cannot homogenise Muslims into just one group.

There are two specific expanding followings of extremely hardline muslims groups energetically operating in this country, to spread their particular ways; the Wahhabi sect (Saudi Arabia), and the Deobandis sect, (India). A lot of money is pouring into this country backing them. Fitzpatrick seems to be nudging us to open our eyes and take stock. Not against Muslim people at large, far from it, but at the political movements out to further their own ends. The Government Minister said he believed the East London Mosque was being influenced by the Islamic Forum of Europe, seen as a backer of Sharia law. “I think the stranglehold influence of the IFE is present more than ever. We are trying to build social cohesion in a community but this is not the way forward.”

Our culture in the UK, evolved through Protestantism, believes that everyone was born equal in the eyes of God and Man so segregation of any desription is a No-No. This issue is not about a right to choose to segregate, but about whether we tolerate the whole idea of segregration. Afterall, it’s not such a big leap between male and female segregration and between black and white – and I think we can all agree, that was plainly unjust.

Footnote: Muslim weddings I have been to usually have the main wedding ritual segregated. In one room , the priest deals with the groom asking him 3 times if he takes the woman as his wife. Then he goes to the other and asks the bride 3 times if she takes the man as her husband. After that, there are prayers and the ceremonial ritual is over. Then, men and women have mingled in the same room.  Segregation at weddings isn’t laid down by Islamic law.

Tags: Christian faith, Deobandis, Isla, Islamic faith, Islamic Forum of Islam, Jim Fitzpatrick, Muslim, Muslim wedding, Protestanism, religious tolerance, segregation, segregation men and women, UK culture, Wahhabi, wedding ritual

This entry was posted on Friday, August 14th, 2009 at 12:31 pm and is filed under cross-cultural differences, cultural diversity, General, social practices . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.